Design like no designers were watching and you wanted to make your job obsolete.
Would you be a designer if your friends thought you were a plumber? if the answer is no, quit.
Status is the currency of aesthetics and nobody is free to live outside aesthetic hierarchies. Not even you, specially not you.
Constraints are never the problem. Pre-packaged ideas are always the problem.
Learn craft first, systems thinking second, symbolic building third and then mix it all together.
You won't do your best work alone. listen even if it hurts and learn to let go to go further.